How Can Parents Promote Social Skills Development in Early Childhood?

· Provide children with opportunities to play socially.

Children who play socially with same-age peers are at an advantage when they enter daycare and preschool. These advantages are increased when children maintain these social-relationships over the long term, thus making good friends.

· Play with your children.

Children who play with their parents develop broader social skills, especially when they play in a positive and peer-like manner. Parents of the most socially advanced children tend to laugh and smile more often, avoid criticism, respond to the child's play ideas, and take direction as well as give direction during play.

· Talk about the importance of social relationships.

Children of parents who make time to talk with children daily about their social activities at daycare or preschool are more likely to be viewed by teachers and other children as more socially competent.

· Take a problem-solving approach to social difficulties.

When a child describes a social problem, the parent should listen, be empathic, try to understand the other child's viewpoint, and help the child brainstorm a variety of solutions. When children are encouraged to think about others' feeling and needs, they are likely to be viewed as more positive and pro-social by peers. When children gain insights about their own emotions through discussions with their parents, these children tend to be better liked by their peers.

· Endorse positive social strategies.

Parents should help their children choose solutions to social problems that increase the probability of play or friendships, rather than aggression or rejecting the other child.

· Reflect a positive and resilient attitude toward social rejections.

Socially competent children view rejections by peers as temporary or as situations that they can improve by changing their own behavior. Their parents avoid defeatist comments, such as, "Those kids are just mean."

· Intervene only when necessary but generally permit children to work out their problems.

While young children's play is more sophisticated when an adult is present to facilitate social interactions, preschoolers need to learn to work out social problems on their own. Social skills are best learned and practiced in real social situations. Parents who interfere may actually inhibit their child's social development.

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